Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Avoid an ugly break-up!

Ending your relationship can be a messy affair, but here’s how you can avoid creating an ugly scene

Not all relationships last a lifetime and often it’s best to end things before they get ugly. So, now you have decided to break up with your girlfriend/boyfriend. But don’t think it’s an easy job. It’s likely that the other person still has feelings for you, so try and ensure that you end things graciously so that a beautiful relationship doesn’t end with an ugly fight.

Don’t break up at a public place:
While you may have gotten used to the idea of breaking up your girlfriend/boyfriend may need sometime to get used to the idea. So ensure that there’s some privacy when you are breaking up. You wouldn’t want to be a part of an ugly scene or fight and be a spectacle for those at the joint.

Don’t get into it at your usual hang out:
Break-ups can be messy, so don’t opt for a place that you are likely to frequent. In case you don’t part of absolutely amicable terms at least people who know you won’t be a witness to any kinds of fight.

Don’t be too casual:
Don’t break up while you are doing some mundane task like picking up groceries or chomping on a huge burger. Give your relationship and your partner some respect and plan how you want to go ahead with it.

Breaking up over sms or email:
While this may work for some, it may prove to be hara-kiri for others. Those who cannot express themselves may find the options of writing an email or a letter very appealing and it’s not a bad option considering it allows you to elaborate your feelings. Also, it’s prefect for those who prefer to avoid confrontation. Breaking up over SMS, however, can be highly insensitive. After all 160 characters can’t be enough to end a relationship. However, breaking up over SMS too has its share of fans and has worked for many people.

Avoid breaking up over networking sites:
Those status message or pictures that you post are seen by so many people. Do you want all of them to be witness to your break-up? Plus if your break up is not an amicable one, do you want them to enjoy a mud slinging match between your and your girlfriend/boyfriend?

The slow and steady way:
The best way to break up often turns out to be the slow and steady way. This is where you make your partner realise that things are not working out between you. Give him/her sometime to get used to the idea, so that when you go for the ‘big’ talk, it doesn’t come as a nig surprise for him/her.

Don’t put all the blame on your partner:
Don’t go hammer and tongs at your girlfriend/boyfriend when you decide to give that big break up speech. Be practical and tell your partner that this is what you think would be best for you.

Don’t make false promises:
Even if your partner gets highly emotional or cries buckets, don’t make false promises like ‘I’ll think about it’ or ‘maybe we can give it another shot’, unless you really mean it. Once you feel that a relationship is going nowhere it’s silly to keep dragging it just because you care for the other person. Understand the difference between friendship and love and act accordingly

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