Sunday, February 28, 2010

Keep Your Husband Happy

Female Intuition
It comes natural to most females to have that mother instinct, that certain feeling that when something is wrong with your children you know it. Well you must use this same instinct with your mate.

You can read his body language, listen to his words and read between the lines when needed. Look into his eyes, watch his facial expressions. Just make sure you always notice if his habits are changing. Keep in tune with his needs and wants.

Be aware if he is not talking as much? Is he coming home later than usual? Is he drinking or smoking more? Is he avoiding answering his cell phone when he sees your number?

Well maybe it's time to put a little fire back into the romance and keep it there, to keep your husband Happy, before someone eles does.

Do What Comes Natural
1- Give him a good morning kiss or hug when he wakes up.

If you wake up beside him in the bed, snuggle next to him and put your head on his chest, and put his arm around you. He'll love that feeling of protecting you with his strong arm holding you close.

2- Listen to his same old stories and jokes again and again.

Sure you've heard them a million times, and sometimes you roll your eyes to the top of your head or mimic every word waiting for the end of an outcome you know too well. But just think back to when you first started dating or just got married and he told these funny or interesting little anecdotes.

Think about your smiles and your laughter you gave him then, come on you remember, come on, now bring those feelings to the present moment when he's on stage again. Enjoy the moment, and be the positive audience he wants and needs you to be. This will keep your husband happy.

3- Give him a shoulder massage when he comes home from work.

If you are there when he arrives, take his brief case or bag and set it down. Immediately start massaging his shoulders while he is standing. Lead him over to a chair and sit him down, while you continue to relax him. You don't have to be an expert masseuse.

This will help to ease the tension of a hard days work. As you are massaging him ask him how was his day. And really listen as he tells you. If you feel your massaging skills are a little rusty, no problem, just Google "massage techniques" for some ideas.

4- Buy him 2 tickets to his favorite Sports game.

What's his favorite sport? Every man seems to be interested in one sport or another. Does he like golf, baseball, basketball, football, hockey, soccor, rugby, drag racing... Whatever sport turns him on, treat him and his best buddy to tickets to an upcoming event. His buddy can be you or one of your children, or grand-dad or whomever he chooses.

If buying 2 tickets to his favorite sport is not in the budget, never fear, here is what you can do. Order a sports event on cable. This will be less expensive than the actual tickets, and your cable company will bill you later on your momthly bill.

No cable. No problem. Schedule some alone time for him to watch his favotite event on TV. Have some beer in the fridge or whatever his drink is. Have his favorite snacks on the table, and his favorite dinner ready for him, on a plate in the fridge as well. Tell him about the food, so he can pop it in the oven during half time.

Leave the house, take the kids and any other relatives and pets. Monitor the game from your car radio so you will know when to arrive back home. Go shopping, visiting, to a park, etc., enjoy your time away as well.

Give him at least 45 mins to an hour after the game is over before you return. This will give him time to savor the good feelings he has about enjoying his favorite sport. Plus it will give him a little time to himself, and a chance to start missing you as well. Doing this for him once in a while will definetly keep your husband happy.

Sweets For Your Sweets
5- Put his favorite candy on his pillow.

Once you or him have made the bed (just like they do at the hotels).leave him a treat. If you don't know what his favorite candy is that's ok for now. But he is your husband and this is something you must find out and add to your memory bank. Just notice what gum he always chews or what mint he likes and put one or two of these on or under his pillow now and then.

6- Bake him a birthday cake.

Hey, it's his birthday. Don't order a cake from the bakery. Simply find an easy cake recipe on Google, and bake the cake yourself. If you feel you don't have the time to do this or just dont want do. It's still easy. Go to any grocery store: Buy 1 box of Betty Crocker, Pillsbury or other cake mix. Follow the easy baking instructions on the package, Add icing to the finished cake and put your special message on the icing using a different color icing or a tube of icing (which is easy to write with).The tube of icing is easily found in the cake mix isle at almost any grocery store. He'll love that you took the time out to bake it yourself.

7- Help him watch his diet. Don't have too many sweets and fattening foods around the house. Always fix his favorite foods using low salt, low fat, low cholesteral, low calorie and low sugar whenever possible. Become an expert nutritionist for yourself, your husband and your other family members and friends.

Dont Take His Feelings For Granted
8- Don't ever disrespect him in front of his friends.

This is a definite NO NO. No matter what the disagreement or situation, wait until you both get alone to iron out the problem. This cannot be stressed enough. A man's male ego is a super powerful source of strength. If you knock his ego down in front of his friends or relatives. You may crush him so bad that it will be very hard for him to forgive you. He may want to forget about the incident but his friends may remind him, or just being around them can be a constant reminder of how you dissed him in their eyesight.

9- Don't bring the car back with the gas tank on almost empty.

If you use his car or the two of you share the car don't always let him be the one to fill up the gas tank. When possible get a fill up once in a while. If your money will not allow a fill up, at the very least put back the gas in the tank on the same gallon mark it was on when you started your errands .example: 1/4 tank, 1/2 tank, 3/4 tank etc.. You may not be able to do this everytime, but when you do he will appreciate it very much.

10- Don't talk while he's watching his favorite TV show.

If he initiates the conversation, be breif with your comments or answers to his questions. Don't add conversation about the kids and school problems, leaky faucet troubles, bill problems, etc. Treat his TV time just like you would if you were at the movie theatre, and quietly respect the relaxing and enjoyable atmosphere.

LOVE Is In The Air
11-Tell him you Love him.

It doesn't hurt to hear the words once in a while. When was the last time you told him? Just don't think that he is suppose to know you love him since you're still with him after all these years. Actually say the words "I Love You" to him daily or a few times a week. Watch the difference it makes in his love expressions to you.

12- Let Him Be The Man He Was Meant To Be.

Let him take care of you physically, financially, and gallantly. This will keep your husband happy. Chivalry is alive and well.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Touch for Rapture Rather Than Effect

Once I had a client-couple, Arthur and Ellie (not their real names). Arthur loved making out with her, and she loved his enthusiasm and attention. He loved the way she felt—there was something about her smooth and creamy skin, and the way she responded with such delight to his loving and passionate touch. Yet (and she felt guilty just thinking about it, because she knew he was trying so hard) Ellie often found it hard to fully surrender to his touch. Sometimes she felt almost as if she were resisting it! This made no sense to her—he was so enthusiastic and passionate!

Arthur (being the sensitive soul that he is) noticed this (eventually) and thought, “I should focus even more on making sure this feels really good to Ellie. I want her to fall in love with the way I make love with her.” So he’d try even harder to get the good effects. And while Ellie appreciated his intention, the more he turned up his efforts, the less what he did felt good to her.

Every woman wants as much love, care, and attention, just like Art was giving to Ellie! Why wasn’t their strategy working? Should I have told Arthur to try less to please her?

Arthur was following a common strategy: he was trying to make it feel good to her. Well—doesn’t that make sense? I call this strategy “touching for effect.” You are touching for effect when your goal is to make the other person feel pleasure.

Touching for effect puts your attention on you (“How am I doing?”) rather than on your partner—and your partner can feel this. Pleasure occurs in the present moment, not in the future. Great pleasure comes from playfulness and exploration, not from trying to make something wonderful happen.

Here’s what happens with the touch-for-effect strategy:

•Your partner can feel that you are not engaging with them in the present moment. They can feel that your attention is on your performance—not really on their pleasure.
•Because your attention is on how well you’re performing, it isn’t on your pleasure either—so you actually feel less than you could. The less you can feel, the less you are aware of (and can respond to) what your partner is feeling. If you think they can’t tell this is happening, ask them

Why We Flirt: The Science of Sex

It’s so natural, we barely even notice we do it. Tilting a head to expose the neck, smiling or laughing at something that really wasn’t funny, moving closer to the person making unfunny jokes, mimicking their actions. Our body language is perhaps the most subtle expression of what we’re really thinking and feeling, and is a crucial component of the courting dance known as flirting.

Though cheesy pick-up lines abound, a lot is conveyed even before words are uttered. A prolonged gaze or arched eyebrow gives clues to the person across the bar that you’re interested without having to explicitly ask about his/her sign. Though the statistics differ, some attribute almost 80 percent of our first impressions to our stance and swagger. And because flirting helps both animals and humans find mates faster and easier, it is an evolutionary trait hard-wired in our brains. Mice twitch their noses at potential mates, colorful peacocks strut around for admiring peahens, and pigeons puff their chests to look buff. As much as we have moved on from mice and feathers, we do much of the same, for the exact same reasons.

Genetic Peacockery
Because flirting is an easy way for us to display our genes, mating potential, and interest, nature put a lot toward its success. This is one of the reasons why some males birds have exotic plumes, why elk carry hefty antlers (a sign of a healthy immune system), and why male fiddler crabs have such large claws. He waves his in the air, alerting females to his whereabouts, and signaling them to come closer for a better look at his burrow, colorful shell, and flashy claw.

Much in the same way, we’re physically programmed to indicate interest almost before we mentally have a say in it. Slight actions reveal a lot. Stance, eye movement, and gestures like leaning forward to talk to the person, or quick eyebrow raises are what scientists call contact engagement, signaling to the other mammal that you’re prepared for things to potentially get physical. Perhaps most importantly, these signals show that you’re not intending to dominate or flee. Or not just yet, anyhow.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

tips for boys to love some girl

The following are the tips for boys to love some girl:
Make a cassette tape of your and her favorite love songs, then record (in your voice) a special, romantic message at the end!

Write her a Love poem.

Leave little notes around telling her things you love about her.

Let her rest her head in your lap.

If she's feeling stressed out, give her a massage and help her work out a better way to do things.

Surprise him with a candle-lit dinner.

Let her wear your clothes. It's almost guaranteed she'll look better in one of your button down shirts than you do. (Kind of sexy too!)

If she makes dinner, offer to do the dishes.

Always be a gentleman--hold the door for her.

Give her the same respect you enjoy from her.

Make an effort to get to know (and if you can, love) her family.